tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918105604270007470.post5298923459313809752..comments2023-10-09T15:47:14.355-04:00Comments on And you may ask yourself-well...how did I get here?: Words Words WordsStarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241931590875029855noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918105604270007470.post-83782025625766864522010-07-24T01:41:17.320-04:002010-07-24T01:41:17.320-04:00It hasn't even been two months since I lost my...It hasn't even been two months since I lost my husband. Most days I don't even know what day of the week it is without actually looking at the calendar. I constantly find that I can't remember something from one room to another & even retracing my steps doesn't help. I feel like I'm losing my mind. It makes it that much more difficult that I have a 9 month old and 2 1/2 year old to take care of. I feel so guilty that I am not "altogether" even half of the time. Some days, the busy days, I make it through without breaking down, but as soon as I have some down time, I feel like I'm back at day one when the knock on the door shattered my world. While this reality is unwanted, I have to say that even with your current struggles, you still manage to shine some light of hope for others who are walking in your shoes.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918105604270007470.post-23315521653568182922010-07-23T03:13:57.156-04:002010-07-23T03:13:57.156-04:00It does get easier, overall...but that doesn't...It <i>does</i> get easier, overall...but that doesn't mean you won't have bad spells like what you are right now. <br /><br />After 5 years of this, I've found that the run-up and anticipation/dread of the death anniversary would start anywhere from 2-3 weeks ahead of time (in the last year or so) to anywhere from 6-8 weeks ahead of the date. Yeah, um, no one ever told me that the grief might start rearing back up quite <i>early</i> before the date in the earliest years.<br /><br />You'll go back to "normal"--whatever exactly that is for you--after the end of August. It might not be the same normal, or even quite as stable and predictable or you were before a month or two ago...but eventually you'll come back. And eventually you'll be able to marvel at how far you've come...although that'll take a long, long while. <br /><br />That second year is still so fresh and new. Try to be gentle and patient with yourself, keep your nonnegotiable obligations to a minimum, and take it one day or hour at a time if you need to. You'll make it through...even it ain't pretty in the meantime. ;o)<br /><br />Many hugs and much love, peace, and sane thinking as possible in the next weeks, my friend.<br /><br />xoxo,<br />CandiceCandicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11637366044613952294noreply@blogger.com