tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918105604270007470.post666404687375624281..comments2023-10-09T15:47:14.355-04:00Comments on And you may ask yourself-well...how did I get here?: Wrong Side of the BedStarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241931590875029855noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918105604270007470.post-62145682546698406402009-02-08T15:32:00.000-05:002009-02-08T15:32:00.000-05:00I could NOT sleep on Charley's side of the bed...I could NOT sleep on Charley's side of the bed after he died. (I could barely sleep in the bed at all, period, but that's a different issue entirely. For probably the first year or more, I couldn't face going to bed without him there. So I'd play Freecell on my laptop on my couch in the living room until I was so woozy that I'd fall asleep for a few hours. Then I'd wake up around 4-5 am, crawl upstairs and get into bed, and then I could go back to sleep before I had to remember that he was dead and I was always going to be sleeping alone.)<BR/><BR/>But for me, I couldn't sleep on his side of the bed. It was too weird. Too hard. It was HIS side of the bed...plus it was farther from the door...harder to hear (as if a whole 3-4 feet would make much of a difference) Anna in her crib when she woke up.<BR/><BR/>I never once slept on his side. Until I moved. And now I ONLY sleep on his side of the bed. <BR/><BR/>I always used to sleep on the middle or the right side of the bed, even before male bed buddies came into the equation. I had to lie on my right side, facing to the outer edge of the bed (hence, I had to be on the right side), to feel "right" as I tried to fall asleep. I learned to fall asleep on my left side & facing the middle of the bed when I wanted to sort of cuddle with Charley as we fell asleep (he could NOT sleep while cuddling and didn't particularly like cuddling in bed, so it was really more just curling around his back). <BR/><BR/>But the right side ALWAYS used to be "my" side when I had to share the bed...when my sister would share a bed with me, when my cats would sleep with me, with boyfriends. Or else I'd sleep in the middle. But now I sleep on the left, my dog on the right. <BR/><BR/>And now, I think it has more to do with where the door is. As a mom (and since I can choose which side now...curse that absent/dead husband), I just sleep on the side that's closest to the door, and thus my kid. <BR/><BR/>Don't know why I'm babbling so much in this comment. Must be because I'm having blog withdrawals. I miss writing on my blog (and reading my new friends' blogs) all the time too. =( Stupid full-time jobs.... <BR/><BR/>Hang in there with you anniversary this month....<BR/><BR/>Hugs,<BR/>CandiceCandicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11637366044613952294noreply@blogger.com