tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918105604270007470.post7940054774677251954..comments2023-10-09T15:47:14.355-04:00Comments on And you may ask yourself-well...how did I get here?: My Tuesday AfternoonsStarhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18241931590875029855noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918105604270007470.post-88811613864514807742010-03-19T18:13:58.676-04:002010-03-19T18:13:58.676-04:00Your words resinate with me:
I look at this child...Your words resinate with me:<br /><br />I look at this child's mother.<br />She is tired.<br />She is stressed.<br />She is aging way faster than she should.<br />Her entire life is her son.<br />She tries to be positive and gives so much to him.<br />But he requires constant care.<br /><br />That is me now, that is my life now, I am that mom. While I understand how you say as crazy and dark and horrible it sounds......but you are just simply telling the complete and honest truth. <br /><br />I too, have had to share my morbid thoughts in my blog. The ones where I can't stop thinking ....maybe it would have been better that my daughter had died that day, on the street. <br /><br />Our daughter was on the threshold of death and we were ready to have to make the decision to let her go, but then things changed, they said we had to give her a chance. You know, because she had age on her side. <br /><br />It has been 9 months and not too incredibly much has changed. I am so sad about this realization, I often times wish it were different for us.<br /><br />I read your blog all of the time and when I asked if I could link yours to mine, I feared that if you ever flipped over my way, you may say, but her brain injured family member lived, she didn't die (honestly, I don't know you so I have no idea what you would think) but the truth of the matter is, I read yours and sometimes wish I were in that boat. I suppose what is meant to be....is for each of us.<br /><br />Life is so strange! The grass is always greener. No one can ever comprehend what we are each individually going through and nor should we ever venture to try, because we will never fully understand.<br /><br />I loved this post, but it also made me so sad. For all involved, you and your loss, the mother you are speaking of and her son, my family, and all others who have experienced a loss! <br /><br />That's what a great post does, makes you feel, right?<br /><br />Take care!Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02455367671890571478noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918105604270007470.post-3604691730038958712010-03-18T17:28:14.142-04:002010-03-18T17:28:14.142-04:00I had a vision of that before Gavin died, too. He ...I had a vision of that before Gavin died, too. He was 20 years older than me. He was so weak from one chemo that he was in a wheelchair, and only 100 lbs. I was wheeling him to the doctor, thinking... if this is my life... I don't think I can handle it. <br /><br />I couldn't have gone on like that. Fortunately he got much better before he got worse again, so I didn't quite have a nervous breakdown.<br /><br />Hugs on these tough thoughts.<br /><br />X<br /><br />SupaSupa Dupa Freshhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07659738264922395349noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6918105604270007470.post-1711962823267310312010-03-18T13:55:37.146-04:002010-03-18T13:55:37.146-04:00You would have done it because you had no choice a...You would have done it because you had no choice and because you loved Roger. It's no different from what people say to us--"I don't know how you do it"..."You're so strong"..."I could never do what you're doing," etc., etc., etc. <br /><br />But I understand completely where you're coming from. As sick as it makes me that Charley died instantly and that he's not here, I <i>have</i> always been relieved, in a twisted way, that he didn't survive it, because it would have been impossibly hard--for him, for me, for our families. The Terry Schiavo case was running rampant in the last few months before Charley died, and at least I knew what both Charley's and my preferences were if we ever found ourselves in that position; neither of us EVER wanted to live like that. And in the years since Charley died and I've had time to absorb just how bad they could have been had he lived and been, basically, a vegetable, I can endlessly sympathize with Terry Schiavo's husband and "remarrying" and creating a new family before Terry had even died. I understand it completely...and like you, I'm grateful to have been spared a different type of nightmare...and I still wish Charley could still be here, whole, healthy, and alive too.<br /><br />Hugs, my friend.Candicehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11637366044613952294noreply@blogger.com