Monday, November 24, 2008

Karma is a b*tch

Kindergarten is so wrong.
We are told to share our toys in order to be fair, to be nice, and to be a good person.
We are taught that if we are those things, then good things will happen to us.
We are taught that if we will plant good seeds then we will reap the good benefits.
But Karma is involved.
Karma sticks in her ugly head and puts her dirty hands into everything.
And I used to think she was different.
I used to have a completely different impression of her.
I thought she was fair.
I used to believe she gave people what they deserved but now I realize that is not the case.
She doesn't care what kind of seeds you have planted or what good deeds you have done.
No, Karma is a b*tch.
Karma is a real pain the the ass.

It is not the good people of the world that get what they deserve.
Look at me.
I am a good person.
I do good things.
Yet, here I am suffering the worst pain of my life.
Maybe its mental pain which is the best pain you can have because you can escape it supposedly. But for me there is no escape.
There is no place to hide.
I don't deserve this.
This is not fair to me.
This is not fair to his mother.
This is not fair to any of Roger's family.

Last night my broken heart was trampled on.
A marriage that I admired and that I used as an example in my own ended.
But it did not end in divorce.
No, it ended in the same way as mine.
I'm so angry that I have this in common with such a good friend.
How can this be!!
Why her?
Why her children?

She was just here supporting me.
She supported me on my wedding day.
This is not what she deserved.

Where is this fairness we are taught about?
Why isn't Karma punishing those who deserve it?
Why is she punishing the good?

Life is not fair!

1 comment:

Mamie Hall said...

I am so sorry to hear about your friend. I totally agree about the karma thing!