Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Seven Pounds

"Seven Pounds" came out in December after Roger died.
Per many of my friends, it was on my forbidden list of movies to see.
And for a while I obliged.  

I sort of knew the premise of the movie - a guy donating his organs.
I did not realize the entire plot of this movie.
Over the weekend, I watched this movie as it was on TV for free. 

Will Smith's character was texting while driving (a huge pet peeve of mine).
And was in a car accident where his wife was killed along with the people in the other car.
Smith's character decides to kill himself however he wants to donate parts of his body and life to people he deems good and deserving.  
At the end of the movie, those who benefited from his gift get to meet each other.

It was a great movie and great story line.
Back in December 2008, I thought people did not want me to watch the movie due to the organ donation part.
What I did not realize was the car accident part.
The widower part.
The part where perhaps my friends and family thought I may have been suicidal.
Maybe they thought I would try something similar or thought it was a good idea.

In reality, I was never suicidal then or since then.  
But it was a good idea for me not to see that movie back in December 2008.

At home on my own couch, I started to get antsy as the movie progressed.
As he flashed back to the accident.
As he saw his wife's bloody body at the scene.
I could relate.  This part of the movie was right on the money.
I have been reliving the accident a lot lately.
I have been seeing Roger's blood on my hands and on his head.
I have been trying to remember the details (again).
It never goes away really but currently it is fluxing again.

As the movie ended, I was in a heap of tears.
Afterwards, I had to walk away. 
The emotions were overwhelming.
Thinking back to it, the tears reappear.

Thinking back to it all, the tears reappear.

2 comments:

CJ Marley said...

I lost my husband to cancer so it wasn't so much the car accident for me but the whole death thing itself. His overwhelming grief. And then the end scene looking into the eyes of his eye recipient did me in because Mike's corneas were the only thing he could donate. It was a movie that was very hard on my heart but I loved it all the same. It's hard for most people to realize that widows/widowers look at death in a whole different light after our loss and it's obvious that the character did as well.

Autumn said...

I constantly replay finding John that day in the bed over and over again... I can't get it out of my head. Touching his cold feet and hard body and yelling at him to wake up.
I doubt I will ever forget.
And movies sometimes get us when we are least expecting it. Because it's all fresh for me I have to be very ccareful the things I see. I have found myself only being able to watch animated films and cheesy romantic comedies.. but even those can be tough.