Sunday, February 15, 2009

Valentine's Day

As I read about how wonderful my friends' husbands are on facebook, I can not help but think "Yeah, well, mine was better he is just not here."

As I look at the pictures of the flowers or gifts they got, I still can not help but wonder what Roger and I would have done for the day.
Would we have gone to dinner during the week or tonight?
I probably would have made him his favorite ginger chicken with green peppers and carrots.  
I have not made that in forever even before he left me.  

Instead of spending the day with my fabulous husband, I spent the day with some good friends.
Yesterday morning, Rusty and Natalie took me to breakfast to start.  
Before the girls arrived for a sleepover and dinner, I cleaned and organized my house.
I learned how to use a drill and I know Roger would be proud.
I learned how to hang things using plastic anchors.  Roger would be really proud of that. 

I made the girls dinner instead of Roger.  
I made my BBQ sauce which Roger liked but did not love.  I grilled some chicken.  
And did not make rice.  
Roger would have wanted rice.
The lovely Courtney made some yummy chocolate fondue to end the meal.  

It was the best evening I could have possibly have had under the circumstances.
I am very grateful for friends that continually support me.

And then I went to bed...
Reality set in.
Everyone else in world is at home having sex with their lovers.  
Everyone else celebrating and snuggling with their favorite people.  
And I was sleeping alone.

I could not sleep.  
I ended up waking up about every two to three hours.  
"Am I still alone? Yep, still just me."

What will next Valentine's be like? Who knows.
Will my friends still be single or want to be here with me?
At least there will not be anymore red hearts and rose salesman for a while.

1 comment:

Rach said...

I'm not going to tell you to keep your chin up or any of that Bull Shit... But there is a tomorrow and I look forward to reading here again Tomorrow. I am thankful that you had peeps for such a hard day...