Sunday, June 7, 2009

Price of Marriage

We spent pretty much the average amount for the wedding.
And I loved our wedding.
Roger loved our wedding.
It was everything I wanted.
It was my dream.
I used my favorite color.
I used my favorite flower.
I used the best vendors.
It was what I wanted.

But some days, I get angry about it.
I planned most of it myself.
Yes, Roger helped a lot more than most but still the majority of the work was put on me.  
We did the planning ourselves.  
We paid for it ourselves.  

It took up a lot of time to plan that one day.
It was a lot of work to plan that one day.
I had to make a lot of decisions.
I had to make a lot of DIY projects.  
I had to send a lot of emails.  
I had to keep track of a lot of details. 

We kept everything in perspective while we were planning.
We tried to keep everything in balance.
A balance between cheap and over the top.
We wanted a nice wedding without breaking the bank.  
We told each other over and over again, "It's one day but its the only 'one' day we will have."
I was never going to have to do it all again.

And all that for what?
To be married six months?
To go from planning for sixteen months for a wedding to planning a funeral in an hour a little over six months later?

Do not get me wrong.
Do not take this the wrong way at all.
I loved being married.
I loved being married to Roger.  
And I loved the day we were married.  
It was worth every thing we put into it.  
It was worth all the stress and all the headaches.
And every penny.

Yet here I am.  
Fifteen and half months later. 
With nothing but memories, a video tape, and some photos.  


Nicolle said...

I hear ya! I have to say though that even though we were only married for 5 months and 25 days, it was worth every penny. It was the absolute happiest day of my life and I wouldn't have changed a thing. And for a lot our out of town family, it was the last time they got to see Bryan, which I know they are grateful for that time with him.

Rick said...

Great Post!!

I was more fortunate to have been married 7 years and 22 days, but it is a lot of work!!! And now to do it all over again when you meet somebody else? I feel your pain.

Hang in there!!!