Wednesday, January 27, 2010

It is Coming

Whether I like it or not, February is coming.
It is inching toward me.
I am nervous.
I am nervous I will return to last February.

On the actual day, I have class and volunteer hours.
Mr. X has class most of the day.
I am normally alone on Tuesdays...
Ugh.

I'm so so nervous.

As I have mentioned it is/would have been two years.
And that feels unbelievable.
How can that be true?!

It almost feels like I am watching a forecasted hurricane.
As most Floridians know, I have no idea what "it" is going to do.
Will it hit me hard with trees blowing and heavy rain?
Will it be mostly calm and pass by uneventfully?
Will I be well prepared or caught off guard?
Do I need some extra supplies?

Just wake me up later.
Like when it is March.

2 comments:

letterstoelias said...

It's like a constant onslaught of dates to remind us just how much we miss our loved ones. We get through one event, only to be hit with another just around the corner.

I've got a rough couple of months coming up - my birthday in Feb, my daughter's and Elias' birthdays in March, and the first anniversary of Elias' death in April.

I would say wake me up in May, but then I would only be hit by what would have been our 10th wedding anniversary. We had planned to renew our vows. . .

I'll be thinking of you in Feb. As always.

~C~

Learning to Live Without Him said...

I feel your pain. I too, hate Feb. Today, 4 years ago, my husband had his stroke and on the 3rd will be the anniversary of his death. I just want to sleep through the month. I am praying for you and if I may ask, will you do the same for me.
Learning to live without him,
Mandee