Thursday, May 28, 2009

Dear Roger...

Sometimes Roger and I would get into fights and I could not even think straight.  I needed time to process since I am an internal processor like I mentioned.  
So we would agree to talk about everything tomorrow.
Usually one of us would email each other the next day.
It was an unusual system. 
But it worked.  
It worked well.
But I cannot email him now.
I cannot show him how annoyed I am.
But I can write about it anyhow.  


Dear Roger-

You know that I am annoyed that you just left me.
I always told you that you would.
And you did.
You said you would not.
But you did.
You left me.

I am also annoyed and almost pissed off at some of the things you left undone.
First, you did not finish the surround sound project.
You finished your practice round upstairs.  
You know how much I hate all those wires circling the family room.
Why could you have not just finished that?!
I really hate that stupid speaker that had to be put in the sofa.
I still say it effects how the cushions shift around despite your evidence.   
Yes, I should probably just get rid of them if they are so annoying but I am used to sound now.  I just hate kicking the speakers and staring at those stupid wires.  
It looks so messy.

Second, you did not finish figuring out the landscaping.  
You did those maps of the yard showing the shade at each hour but I cannot find them.  I can find one.
I could do this myself I am sure but I am more annoyed that it is undone.  
Those bushes you planted fucking died.  
I stare at the blankness and I do not want to pay the landscaper to do this.  

Third, the stupid stupid aquarium stand.
It haunts me every day.  I just need to finish staining it.  
Simple I know.
But you should have finished it.  
It was your idea.
It was your project.  
And do you even realize how much money was spent on it?!?

Fourth, the shelf in the laundry room.
It was such a simple idea.  We even spent money on the nicer shelf holders.  
But again, another thing you left me to do.

Fifth, I hate that stupid blue man in the garage.
He does not even work.
He needs some electronic work.
And he weighs 600 pounds.  
Why did you not just get rid of him?
He is sitting in the exact same spot as the movers put him two years ago.  
Same fucking place.

Now, you do get some bonus points.
You did that preliminary budget and worked on that the night before the accident.  
It was very helpful.

You get points for also being so organized with your filing.  
It has been helpful.

But I am still annoyed with the other stuff.  

Now, if he could only fix my annoyance...


Rick said...

I feel your pain and you have every right to feel that way!! Hang in there, this rollercoaster rider really sucks and will steady off, someday...

Ann said...

My annoyance with all the unfinished projects (e.g. he had just dug up the back yard for the sprinkler system) was tempered by the knowledge that he HATED leaving a job unfinished. NO ONE is more perturbed than he that he left me with so many unfinished projects! Granted, that doesn't help get them done, but I knew it wasn't on purpose and that he feels as badly about it as I do.

Finishing the basement was one of those projects and I remember once it was done, my hesitation to actually move into it. Doing so changed the way the house looked. It moved things from where they were to where I wanted them to be. It took me a couple of years before I could take full ownership of the house and make it really be the way I wanted without worrying what he might have thought about it.