Saturday, January 10, 2009
Of course I think a lot about our situation, our relationship, and our life right before Roger died.
And in a way, I'm grateful for the timing.
As crappy as it was for me and our plans, I can not really think of a better time if I had to choose. Strange way to think, I know.
But it is somewhat comforting to me.
Roger was on top of life.
We were on top of life.
And really that is the way to go.
On the complete top of the world.
Roger had accomplished so many of his goals including passing his PMP exam and graduating in philosophy.
He was accepted into UCF's graduate certificate program for computer forensics.
We had a wonderful wedding.
We were having fun being married.
He was healthy and strong.
Nothing was ailing him.
Not to mention we had a wonderful July and August.
In July, we had a fabulous third annual fourth of July party with tons of our friends. More people than Roger even wanted but I am so grateful people got to celebrate with us and see Roger alive and well.
People got to see fireworks so close they could literally feel them on their skin as they landed.
We were even making plans about the fourth of July 2009 party.
In August, we went to a piano bar called Howl at the Moon when our friend Scott won a party for 100 of his closest friends.
Roger teased Scott for throwing him a huge party.
With Roger's birthday a few days away, I had the bar write "Happy Birthday Roger" with a dollar from Roger's pocket.
Roger and I ended up not sitting next to each other just due to set up of the table and the addition of new people.
But that was okay, I could stare at him from across the table.
I was totally in love.
Two weeks before the accident, we went to the beach with Holly and Scott to celebrate Roger's birthday, their trash the dress photo shoot, and just hang out.
I brought a "very homemade" Publix cake to celebrate.
Roger looked great.
He had cut his hair in honor of his birthday.
It was an amazing weekend. We spent time at the pool, had amazing seafood, had beachside ice cream, long walks on the beach, and just lots of fun.
We had (and I still do) amazing friends.
Life was good.
Life was actually absolutely amazing.
Life was going so well.
I remember the night before the accident just being incredibly happy with our life.
I was examining my life since we were reaching our six month wedding anniversary.
And although I may have some regrets about not remembering exactly what shirt he was wearing or what exactly we were talking about right when the accident happened, I have no regrets about our relationship.
Just more time would have been nice.
Roger was on top.
The exact way anyone wants to die.
And for that, I'm so grateful.
Posted by Star at 12:42 AM