Thursday, November 6, 2008

Sterotypes strike again

I hate sterotypes.
Racial ones.
Age ones.
Education ones.
Sex ones.
I know they are based on some facts but really people should think just a little more.
Do they really apply 100% of the time.

November 1st was All Saints Day and at church November 2nd was the All Souls Mass.
As weird as it sounds, I was looking forward to this service.
Perhaps I would and did find a little more closure here.

As I have said, it was a really nice service and I am really glad that I went.
I watched as each name was called out and someone rose up to put their person's candle in the sand.
Most of the people were older.
Most of them had their spouse waiting for them back at their seat.
Most of them do not know my story.
Most of them do not know my pain.

Father Charlie gave a great sermon as usual.
I love listening to him.
I feel like he is very empathetic.
He is intelligent and doesn't try to just provoke your emotions.
He is not Father Ed who is my favorite, but he is still wonderful.

My only complaint was his sterotypes.
He talked about how these dead we were there to celebrate were our ancestors.
Hmm...
Roger isn't my ancestor.
He was my today. He was my future. Not my past.
He talked about how we can see our loved ones in our children or our children's childen.
Nope, that's not me either.
He talked about how our loved ones lived on in our children.
Hmm, well as much as Father Ed and Sister Pat pushed us to have children and as much as some people feel its the only thing to do after you get married, that does not apply to Roger and me.

I think this sermon made me cry even harder than I would have.
Seriously, is it that hard to phathom that people die childless and young?
Is it really that unusual?

At Roger's second funeral, the priest talked about how death knows no age.
Death has no age. Absolutely none.
Death doesn't care how old people are.
Death doesn't just happen to old people.

Death has no age.

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